May 2nd 1898
CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS CRAP?! I just got a message from Dr. Tanenhaus telling me the reason why i don't have a backup system for that damn thing called a "TIME MACHINE." Oh all of you in cyber land are gonna love this. I shall quote what he said, just to make sure i don't miss it all. He said in his email back to me, "Due to budget cuts, we were unable to put in a backup hydraulic system." Well no kidding...this really sucks. I bet whats his face from "Quantom Leap" did not have this problem. Thank you Gov. Gibbons for all your wisdom! Anyway sorry i have to vent some times. these people here would not believe a word of it and then they may bring up a witch trial again in my honor if i told them. OK so alot has happened since i last talked to you. First off i kind of enlisted in the service...well lets just say someone else did and i "accidentally knocked" then out and confiscated their papers, for both the navy and Army to be exact...So Private Braun/ Gunners mate Braun reports as ordered. HAHA!! Anyway you didn't hear that from me. Yesterday i was Gunners mate Braun USN and we did something really cool. We got to engage the enemy off the coast of Manila! First off i always wanted to go see the world and second off...ITS THE PHILIPPINES!
Well i have been around let m e tell you, while I'm in the navy i am a part of Admiral Dewey's Asiatic fleet, on his Flagship the Olympia. We (our convoy of seven ships) set out from Mirs bay on April 27th. Mirs bay is also known as tai pang wan, or Dapeng Bay in Hong Kong China. I know, you wanna know how the heck i ended up there...magic, and a magician never tells his secrets. well anyway, As the Admiral stated in his letter to Washington, [We] arrived off bolinao on the morning of April 30, and finding no vessels there, proceeded down the coast and arrived of the entrance to Manila bay on the same afternoon (Admiral Dewey, May 4, 1898). Now it was just a waiting game for what the good ol' Admiral wanted to do. buy my watch, which is keeping great time because its atomic lol, we began entering the the south channel of Manila bay and at 11:30 while half of the column of ships came through the channel a battery from the beach opened fire on us. Ha but these Spaniards must have forgotten their glasses because not a shot took affect on us. But for a greenhorn like me i simply pretended that i was a captain and strongly shouted to a fellow gunner, Gunners mate fetch me my Brown Pants!! and hit the floor of my position!
Our convoy of ships took their places off the coast of Manila and at around 5:00 a.m, the shore batteries opened up on us. I will let my new friend Gunner Joel C. Evans who is breathing over my shoulder wanting to type on this new machine and tell his story to all of you cyber historians. You see Joel is a gunner off the gunboat USS Boston. Here he is... No Joel don't talk to the screen, you need to use the keyboard...There you go. " I was in charge of the Forward ammunition supply on the Boston during the battle of Manila bay" (Joel Evans, Aug, 1898).
Umm anything else Joel? Yes? OK sorry ill let you tell then for a bit while i go and get some hardtack, just don't hit the power button...I know you don't know what that is...never mind.
(Joel continues)"I must tell first what we did below, where we could not see the fight, but felt it perhaps more that those above. It was a little after half past five o'clock when the roar of a gun on our deck above let me know that we had taken a hand in the game."
OK Joel I'm back, so Joel how did that make you feel hearing the guns go off, knowing that you had engaged the enemy?
"I think it was the proudest moment in my twenty-four years in the Navy. I had sent many a shell above to hit or miss a sand bank or some old hulk for target practice, but we knew now that everyone meant business." (Joel Evans, Aug, 1898).
Well Joel, What did the ammunition look like, i mean how did you guys do what you did down there...Don't look at me like that Joel, i know i went through training (not) but i need to you to tell me.
"Each projectile was slung ready for use, the powder in copper cylinders and the fixed ammunition for the rapid-firing guns in boxes. The men worked coolly, with nothing troubling them but the heat and curiosity. Their eagerness to know what was going on was overwelming and impelled them to rush to the ports to discover the cause of extraordinary activity on deck or of lulls in the firing." (Joel Evans, Aug 1898).
Did you do the same Joel?
"I had little opportunity for this, as i had to be particularly careful that no error was made in the ammunition, and that not a second was lost. What between orders for full and reduced charges, steel and shell, i was kept busy all the time." (Joel Evans, Aug 1898).
Joel, where you or the crew scared as to what was going on?
"I never saw men as easy minded as those below; and later, when i went on deck, one would have fancied we were at a garden party for all the fear exhibited. The Chinese showed as much nerve as the Americans. " (Joel Evans, Aug 1898).
It was interesting to take note that while i was on the Olympia during the battle, i seen two what looked like torpedo boats comming at us. The Admiral states in his letter to Washington, " early in the Engagement two launches put out toward Olympia with the apparent intention of using torpedoes. One was sunk and the other disabled by our fire and beached before an opportunity occurred to fire torpedoes." (Admiral Dewey, 5/4/1898).
However that's all fine and dandy but i really like Joel's take on it, go ahead Joel, tell them.
"The most exciting incident of the battle, perhaps never exceeded in its audacity and its fearful results for the attacking party, was the attempt of two torpedo-boats to destroy the Olympia. They waited as she approached, and then came at her full speed. The Olympia poured a storm of big shells about them, but they presented such a small target at the distance of several miles that they were not hit, and each moment of their nearer approach was filled with suspense and dread for all our ships. Insignificant as they were, they might send the flagship to the bottom of the bay, and every shot directed at them carried a prayer for its success. When within eight hundred yards the Olympia used her secondary battery, and almost drowned the torpedo-boats in a rain of projectiles. The one which suddenly paused, and then, coming on a few feet, blew up and sank with her crew. The other fled for the beach, and was found there the next day, (today) a mere sieve, battered and blood-stained." (Joel Evans, Aug 1898).
Well it is time for mess... I tell you what, this food sucks. last night one of our boys opened up a can of "Red Horse" and he put his nose above it and smelled it, he wrinkled his nose and spit. he passed it to all the others who did the same thing. What we called that can of "Red Horse became known as embalmed beef. (Keuchel, 1974). Holy crap does this stuff suck! Men are getting suck off this crap. Can you belive that we are getting served this junk, i miss taco bell. Well untill next time...this is Gunners-mate Micah Braun signing off.
